5/6/2010 7:48 PM
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Hi everyone--
Thanks for sending positive thoughts my way. I am a little better and trying to keep my mind off it.
btobe: I can't believe you were awake for the retrieval- you are a tough girl! I had a lot of pain that day and was very glad for the anesthesia and pain meds! Sounds like your embryos are a great quality- 7-8 cells is really good. We've talked here before about the many different theories on bedrest by different docs. My doctor had me on 48 hrs bedrest, then modified activity for 5 days, such as no shopping, housecleaning, etc. Then for the 2ww, no heavy lifting, no high-level exercise, and no sex. And to drink 120- 150 oz per day of water and other fluids such as juice and Gatorade. Best of luck!
epilady- you are too funny! Thanks for the encouraging thoughts. The FSH level was from before I was on any meds,my RE said he would like it to be below 7 for a 33year old. Interesting that you said high stressors can affect egg quailty. Such as my grandmother passing away 2 days before the retrieval, perhaps....
Fensox- Congrats on the high beta, glad to hear everything is progressing well
ladybug, snowie: good luck on the 2ww!
Luci:so sorry for your news....
Nwells: good luck to your softball team! I am with you on the enjoying a good cold drink. I know we would rather NOT be drinking right now, but hey if you can, might as well enjoy it!
Hope I got everyone, this is such an awesome group. I wish I could see the comments when I am writing my reply!
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5/6/2010 3:36 PM
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Luci- I am so sorry that you are going through this. Stay strong and I will keep you in my prayers.
Well we had our transfer today, and had 2 embryos transferred back. Hopefully the other two will be able to be frozen. The embryos who transferred were both grade 1 and one was an 8 cell and one was a 7 cell. I am on my bed rest for the next few days, but RE was very vague on what I could or couldn't do. He just said to rest and relax...was anyone given specific instructions?
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5/6/2010 1:23 PM
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HI,
Much better today- cause what are you going to do right?!
Epilady- HA you crack me up, and you are so right, I think I am going to bring that idea up to my husband and see what he thinks LOL!!!!! YOu know I think of all the things I can do because I am not pregnant and I don't want to do them any more, I want to not be able do them!! I would love to be pregnant at this point!!! But for right now I will enjoy my occasional drink!!!!!
Luci- hang in there, we are here if you need us, I can't even imagine what you are going through!!! I hope your RE is going to look into why you keep having miscarriages!!!
Ok ladies have to go to a meeting- senior prom on Saturday- Yipee I get to go to a PROM!!!! I get to go around and tell the kids to put space between them as the dance erotically on the dace floor- I mean I know it has been sometime since I have been to a club or a dance but seriously the way these kids dance today, it is nasty, and the girls think nothing of it!!! So yeah Saturday will be interesting!!!
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5/6/2010 1:34 AM
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Fensox: congrats!
luci: so sorry for your loss. Please know we're thinking about you.
Nwells: I enjoy social drinking. At times when I'm confronted with an unexpected pregnancy announcement or find myself having an unusually difficult time, I find myself thinking AT LEAST I CAN DRINK! and then get a drink. Then I count all the things I CAN do since I'm not pregnant. I can do situps! I can elevate my heart rate to 140! I can sleep in what ever position I want. I can have seven cups of coffee. (well, I guess I can't right now, because I'm cutting that out. But before this, it was a big positive!) I don't have to worry when I fall down the stairs! (It happens.) I can eat sushi!!!! (seriously: after I found out the embies had stopped developing, both times my husband and I went and gorged on sushi. I'm not entirely sure I can make it a full 9 months without some.) I can change the cat litter. Yay.
Sometimes it helps me, sometimes not. I've considered divorcing my husband, "accidentally" meeting him in Cabo, having wild ex monkey $ex on the beach and in odd places, while I was drunk, and seeing if that worked since it seems to be a prescription to pregnancy for far too many people. My mid-life-thirty-no-baby-spring-break crisis. He's not real big into the idea - well not the divorce part, anyhow. Hmph. Spoilsport.
Hang in there!!
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5/5/2010 11:19 PM
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Fensox - Congrats, I hope that everything continues to go well .
I am doing alright. I miscarried around 10:30 pm last night. I am really sad, but doing a lot better than I thought that I would. The power of denial, I guess. I am trying to be positive and look to the future. I feel bad that this isn't hitting me as hard as I thought it would. I think it is because I only knew for 10 days and I had no sonograms. It was real but it wasn't and compared to my last loss I had 9 sonograms and we were going to find out what we were having when we found out that it was over and then the d&c. I still can't talk about it all even to my therapist. This latest loss will probably hit me when I least expect it to. The baby would have been a year old this month. I hate May.
Nwells- I totally get what you are saying about how easy it is for some to get pregnant. It is always the people who aren't even trying. I wish that I could say something uplifting and positive to help but right now I am having a really hard time with positivity.
I go back to the doctor on Friday to make sure that my levels are going down.
Baby dust to all . Goodnight.
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5/5/2010 10:30 PM
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hey ladies
well i went for margaritas and here I am crying because i just found out my husbands unmarried cousin, who was in the middle of her masters, about to do her internship next year, just met this guy maybe been with him 8 months and yeah she is prego!!! It really isn't that big of a deal she is 27 and she can deal i know but still, wtf why is it so easy for some people she was the last person i expected. Who knows I have been crying for the last 20m min or so, probably the tequ-kill-a but still, it is annoying!!! I am all set!!! going to bed- thanks for listening!!
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5/5/2010 1:33 PM
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afternoon Ladies,
Happy Cinco de Mayo!!! I will be going for margarita's after my softball game!!! I can still have them so I guess looking on the bright side of this whole process, I can still have a drink when I want to, Right!!! I am on a break so I am taking these fertile aid pills, hoping they will help!!!! figure what the heck anything that will help right!!!
OK hope I get everyone!!!
Epilady love you, you are great and the bus thing, too funny!!!! And I hear you on the cramps, after my IVFs my cramps subsided, however I was doing Acupuncture so I don't know that could have helped it a little, after my surgery they have been so much better tylenol helps now before it was really strong stuff.
btobe- please tell me they gave you happy drugs, that process would be painful with out them, I have always been awake just sedated, I know my second time I felt a little pain because the meds started to wear off, I really hope that was the case, as for Transfer, it is nothing, half the time I have know idea my RE has even started the process until she says look at the screen and watch the little bubbles, hey to me it looks like a fuzzy tv screen I never know what the heck i am looking at. As for your eggs and embies I am all about quality not quantity so that is great that you have 4!!!!
Ladybug and Snowie, thinking about you, hope all continues to go well, I don't know what advice to give you because I have had every symptom and I have always been BFN, so sticky baby dust!!!!
Luci how are you holding up, just wanted to check in to see how you are doing
Fansox hope all is going well with you too!!
Mummy- how is it going? hope you are feeling great!!
Well ladies need to get ready for our game so I will talk to you all later!!!
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5/5/2010 1:22 PM
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mablackie - thank you for asking. Here are my numbers...
1 = 128
2 = 225
3 = 961
4 = 2353
I had 2 tests this week. I am done with the blood work for now, thank goodness because that was giving me quite a bit of anxiety. My first ultrasound is tomorrow. If all is well I will have a second one in two weeks and at that point will hopefully hear a heartbeat. I am more relaxed now that I have heard some encouraging words from my dr.
I am 5 weeks and 3 days right now...
How are things with you?
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5/5/2010 12:15 PM
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Fenfox-how did your 3rd and final BETA go? When is your first ultrasound? I hope things are going well for you!
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5/5/2010 1:49 AM
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Ladybug, Snowie & btobe, sticky baby dust. If it makes you feel any better, both times that I did get pregnant (IUIs) I thought that I was getting my AF too. Cramping and spotting. SO I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!!!
Btobe: I can't BELIEVE you did retrieval w/o anesthesia. They used to do that years ago, but that's not the "standard" these days. My ovaries are sensitive anyway (thanks PCOS), and I did experience some moderate pain for the next few days. And the fertilization also depends on if you're dealing with male factor. Out of the 10 mature eggs they IVF'ed (I did some ICSI too), ONE - count em on that single digit - fertilized. So your number is not bad!
The oddest thing is that since my failed IVF cycle, my menstrual cycles have been so so so much better than before. I actually took 1/2 a vicoden in the morning and evening to manage my cramps. Since the IVF: I've taken about 3 aspirin for the pain. It's so odd, but I am NOT complaining!!!
Lucky: I know the mixed feeling. But there's lots of luck to go around. One person's success is not your impending failure. I know your head knows that but I'm sending your heart warm caring vibes. I think it's natural to feel a little jealous when you've been working towards a goal that someone achieves easily.
Irish: I'm sorry about your failed IVF. One of my friends swears by Cornell. She and her husband went through a ton of different treatments and got pregnant (to term) with two lovely babies from Cornell's treatment. Wishing you that same luck! Don't forget that the quantity and quality of your eggs can vary from time to time. This is a very non-technical explanation, but here you go. Even though our eggs are there, hanging out in their little sacs, a certain number of them (depends on our age) start to develop towards ovulation. If you've had large stressors in your life around that time, it can affect the quality of the eggs. If you've typically had good quality eggs, I don't know that I'd immediately jump to the conclusion that your ovarian reserve is diminished. And how are they measuring your FSH when you've been injecting yourself with FSH to stimulate the ovaries? That seems like it would lead to an elevated level (even though FSH has a half life of 3-4 hours, the amount we're using over a prolonged period could degrade slower than that). And from what I understand, under 9 is a normal level - 9.7 doesn't seem super out of whack. It's also my understanding that being under age 35 still predisposes you to a better stimulation and chance of pregnancy even if your FSH levels are higher. It will be interesting to see what Cornell says. Good luck with that consultation.
And when I said what is my life to be if I'm not a mom - I also know that is something we can't see from this point in our lives. But what I do know is that even through the "dead" medium of a computer screen and a typed word, that all you ladies are amazing and wonderful. You share your hopes, your dreams, and you love and support one another even though we are not "friends" in the traditional sense. There are good things out there for you - and a good life. We can never know the future (I could get hit by a bus tomorrow, but if I do, it better not be the one I'm always running after because it comes early!) but you guys are angels on this earth, dispensing wisdom, experience, and love. Never underestimate the importance of your life.
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5/4/2010 10:13 PM
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Btobe - how many embryos are you transfering?
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5/4/2010 10:12 PM
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Btobe - The transfer is easy. No worries.
Good night ladies.
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5/4/2010 9:40 PM
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Thanks ladies. I just am so unsure of everything that is happening, and your positive feedback was much needed. I don't know how I would cope without this forum!!
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5/4/2010 7:58 PM
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Btobe - Sounds like your cycle is looking great! Stay positive. Good luck!
Snowie - Today I'm not feeling things the same as I have been the last couple of days. And today my cramping feels more like AF is coming for a visit. Plus I start the back cramping today which is typical of me when I get my period. However, no sign of AF yet so I hope she does plan on staying away! I'm trying to stay positive. I bought some CBE pregnancy tests today. I will probably test around Thursday (provided AF doesn't show up by then) as I most likely will not be able to hold out until Monday. Minus the meds, I'm not sure when I should be expecting AF. I still need to schedule my blood test. Baby dust, baby dust!
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5/4/2010 2:56 PM
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btope-
That is great! You may even have some left over to freeze. My doctor said that they want half of the mature eggs to fertilize, so your number is perfect! Good luck and take it easy after the transfer.
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5/4/2010 11:08 AM
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Good morning everyone.
Lucky- Thanks for sharing your RE's expectations...that really does make me feel a lot better. I really like my RE but there is a definite lack of communication towards this whole process. I was given a topical anesthesia for my cervix, but nothing other than that for the retrieval. It hurt at the time, but it didn't last long.
I just got the call from the lab. We go in on Thursday for the transfer. Out of our 10 eggs retrieved, 9 were mature and only 4 fertilized. Is this average or does it seem low? I guess I was hoping for more?
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5/4/2010 10:53 AM
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Thanks ladies for the advice on taking time off. I decided to take the week off after my transfer to take it easy.
So I just found out that my sister in law is pregnant again. I really want to be happy for her but I didn't react well when I got home. I feel like she used all the luck and now since she is pregnant this won't work for me next month. I know that isn't true that we could both be pregnant. But I still feel jealous and sad.
Btobe - Did your RE give you anything during the retrieval? I think most people get IV sedation so an atheistic. That is what my RE said we will be doing. I haven't made it that far yet. I am just wondering if you were supposed to be sedated and it didn't work? Also my RE said they would only be trying to get 10 to 12 eggs. So that is a good number. I think some RE's try to get 20 to 30 and my RE said they use to do that but they found that the egg quality is not as great when you produce so many eggs. So if you can get 10 really good eggs then that is better. I think all RE's have differing opinions about this though. But my RE has been doing this for over 20 years so she has seen a lot of different things over that time. Again there isn't just one way that works everyone is different. That is why they call is practicing medicine because there isn't one exact way for every person. Good Luck to you!
Good luck to everyone on there 2ww and transfers! Oh yeah and retrievals.
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5/4/2010 7:40 AM
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Ladybug- I have had cramping that started in the middle of the night and I actually had dreams about it then woke up and realized i was really cramping. So who knows. I will probably test on Mothers day b/c my period is due to arrive Saturday. So if the witch hasnt come by Sunday morning I will test then. Well I should say I will test again. I tested today and it was BFN. Only 10DPO though. I will try to hold out for at least a couple more days before testing. I have been charting my temps and i did read about a thing called implantation dip. And that is when your temp drops then rises again right around the time of implantation.. Well yesterday my temp was 97.32 normally about 97.97 or so and today it was 98.40!!! So I am hoping all the pinching and cramping was implantation and now i am preggo....
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5/3/2010 8:04 PM
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Oh, I have one other symptom that I forgot to mention... cramping... but who knows if that's due to my period that's coming due.
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5/3/2010 7:57 PM
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Snowie - One more thing. My last IVF cycle I thought for sure I was not pregnant, I didn't have any symptoms either. I POAS about 3 or 4 days before my blood test and it was positive. A couple days later I POAS again to confirm and it was confirmed, pregnant. I was shocked. So just because you have no symptoms doesn't necessarily mean anything. GOOD LUCK TO YOU!
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5/3/2010 7:52 PM
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Snowie- I am feeling some symptoms, some nausea, some acidic upset in my stomach, the back of my head hurts, and yesterday morning I woke up with that light-headed feeling (but not feeling that part so much today). But I'm trying not to assume anything at this point. Are you going to test before Mother's Day? I cannot decide whether I should just wait until the 10th (the Monday after) for my blood test and maybe I will be able to get through Mother's Day without crying or if I should test on or before Mother's day to know my answer.
NWells - hang in there. I know the 21st seems like forever away, but it will be here before you know it.
Mummy - how are you feeling today?
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5/3/2010 6:01 PM
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btobe - the transfer is nothing, easy no pain. I can't believe you were awake through the whole thing YIKES, so the transfer will definitely be easier for you. I was out cold for mine. I had 11 eggs, only 3 fertilized and only 2 made it to transfer day. I am not sure what is average but I did not get any disappointment from my doc on 11.
Good luck! I found the days following the retrieval were the most emotional waiting to see how many eggs make it. Keep being positive, it sucks to hear it but you really only need 1
Baby Dust!!!!!
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5/3/2010 5:36 PM
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Hi Ladies. I had my very first egg retrieval today, and I just don't know what to think about the whole day. I was completely awake and I have to admit that I wasn't prepared for the pain during the retrieval. I started to feel better about an hour afterwards, and now i am just sore. The last # that I heard was that they were able to retrieve 10 eggs. I could tell that my RE was disappointed in that number, so now I lost a little of the positive attitude that I have had throughout this entire process. Is 10 average? I keep telling myself that it only takes one good egg!! I guess now I can just pray that the fertilization is going good. What is the transfer like?
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5/3/2010 8:57 AM
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Hello Ladies,
I just got caught up with everyone. I am good, Myrtle was moody on Saturday and made my morning miserable, and the heat didn't help, I was still able to function just a little slower then usual though, which is good. I think back to the way my cramps use to be and I think how did I ever get through them. My appointment was moved till the 21st because my RE wants to wait for the results on Counsyl DNA testing to come back before we meet, that way we have ALL the answers and I either know I can move forward or I need to just accept that I will not be a mom and move on. I feel the same way as epilady what is meant for my life if I am not a mom, but I guess I will have to face that question on the 21st!! Not sure really where I will go, I guess I am remaining hopeful!!!!
To the girls on the their first IVF- the retrieval is not that bad, you will be loopy on happy meds, my third time I watched the screen as my RE removed the eggs, weird!!! You don't feel it, and after you will be a little crampy but I just use a heating pad and tylenol, and it works, then you need to eat protein and drink gatorade or some type of drink with electrolytes . Good luck!!!
Luci, so sorry, I can't imagine how you must feel, I had a tear for you, and I am thinking about you!!!
Fansox, relax, take it easy don't stress yourself out, you are pregnant, what I wouldn't give to have that right now!! everything will be fine.
Irishgirl- been there, through 4 failed IUIs and 3 IVFS, with no frozen embies, just went through a mock cycle. I know how you feel, and you can't give up hope, you have to keep moving forward, take if from someone who knows and has felt that feeling of failure, that it will never work, depression all of it, I know how you feel, I can feel that ache in your stomach, the tears, I know!!! you have to pick your self up move forward, find answers, ask questions. I am here for you!!!!
well ladies I have to get back to work I will talk more later, or tomorrow.
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5/3/2010 7:24 AM
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Ladybug- How are you doing? I was just thinking of you the other day`and wanted to see how you are doing. Are you staying relaxed and calm? We will both be getting news around the same time. I have absolutely NO symptoms so I dont think it is my month. I am 9DPO today ...with my 1st IVF I didnt get a positive till 6DP5DT so that is like 11DPO so I am not gonna test at all before then. AF is due on Saturday so I hope she stays away. Good luck to you and me ;o)
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5/2/2010 10:54 PM
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FenFox actually it takes exactly 2.7 days to double so if you miss the .7 part it may be slightly lower then double but you are really close so I would not worry...you are pregnant exciting!!! Now comes the yucky part hormone surges morning sickness and so on but so exciting....my numbers way mored then doubled waiting to see how many babies next week...have a good week girls lots of love!!!!
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5/2/2010 8:22 PM
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Fenfox-
Yes, that is totally normal! My doctor said that levels take 48 to 72 hours to double, so yours are right on! I know it's hard, my advice for you is to stay off of the interent. I've been doing that recently too. This group is great and wonderful to support you when you need. The bad part of the internet is reading about all of the miscarraiges and things that go wrong. It seems like people only post things when they are bad, not when they are good. I was really freaking out too thinking about all of the things that could go wrong with my pregnancy. I finally stopped spending so much time on the internet. Think positive! I am sure your 3rd beta will be great. Let us know how it goes and try to relax. Good luck tomorrow!
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5/2/2010 6:04 PM
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I am having so much anxiety right now and it is stupid I think. I have my 3rd beta test tomorrow and I guess I am reading too much online because I am so freaked out. I think I am ok but feel like all the monitoring is waiting for something to go wrong and I know that is not the case.
I need to get a grip and keep the positive thoughts flowing but having such a hard time with that right now. The what if is far over shadowing the excitement and that just feels so wrong.
My first beta was 128, my second beta was 225 - this is ok right? I did not double in 48 hours and now I feel like something is wrong with me even though I have read that everyone is different and it can take up to 72 hours to double. Just need some warm, happy thoughts from someone who has been through this and knows more than me...
Fensox...
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5/2/2010 5:32 PM
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Mummy23 - keep your eye on the dream that is coming true, that baby is a wonderful miracle of life. Morning sickness will pass, you will be ok. It is all worth it and you will realize that. Keep the faith, stay strong.
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5/1/2010 10:39 PM
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Hi ladies i have been MIA just like Toni with all the treatment and doctor appts its been crazy... 9 weeks tomorrow baby is and I am so totally depressed I feel I did something terrible knowing the other babies where girls and how badly I wanted them and now I am totally doubting all of this and feel like I am slipping into a depression....not really looking forward to anymore medication no more sickness tired of not being able to eat like a normal person and just kind of overwhelmed....I want to be so happy and do everything just right but not much in the mood for NOTHING I am sure the hormone surge is totally unhelpful and my 18 year old step daughter who brags on Facebook how her family is complete with 2 boys and 2 girls it kinda makes me want to punch her plus last weekend I turned 30 and the day of party she went into labor I asked my hubby to wait for me but he didn't he left to birth his 4th grandchild and because my stepdaughter is crazy as well as her mother I get to be no part of it which makes me even madder...feeling quite like the mad hatter today!!!! Maybe BIPOLAR....who would have thought the effects would be negative rather then positive...and off goes hubby...so I will catch up soon NWells hope your results give a definitive answer with a definite treatment hoping and praying how are you ladies? I have missed you all! Sorry to come on and whine but didn't know where else to go...thanks for being here
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5/1/2010 7:04 PM
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Luci - I am terribly sorry for your situation. I can relate, as I went through the exact same thing last October. I had a positive result and then for no apparent reason my beta kept dropping. After I stopped the meds, I, like you, had to wait to m/c. For me, I stopped meds on a Monday and started to m/c on Friday. I had 6 snow babies, but it does not take away from the loss you feel. No matter how long you are pregnant, you already love the baby you are carrying. Please let yourself grieve (in any way that will help you). I am almost 40, so I felt like I did not have time to "recover" before I tried with my frozen embryos, so we tried again on December 10th and I am happy to say I am almost 23 weeks along and thus far everything is great. My clinic actually told me that pregnancy can occur more often with frozen embryos, so when you are ready to move on, keep that fact in mind. Please take care.
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5/1/2010 6:45 PM
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Luci: I am so sorry to hear about your situation. I know you are terribly disappointed and grieving. I know it doesn't make it easier but it is good news that you have 12 embryos, apparently the FET process is much easier than the whole IVF process.
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5/1/2010 6:24 PM
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FenSox: Congrats on the positive test!!!!! come one beta, double, double, double!!!
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5/1/2010 6:21 PM
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Btobe and Lucky: I found that I was in pain the day of the retrieval and a little groggy from the anesthesia. you definitely can't drive for 24 hrs. But after that you are OK. Unfortunately, my grandmother passed away at the exact same time of my IVF cycle and her wake was the day of my retrieval. I made it to the evening session but I felt very weak. But I was Ok by the next day. I took off the whole week because my job is much easier to plan in advance since you never know exactly what day the retrieval will be. i used the 2 days in between to cook and clean so I could just take it easy after the transfer. But if you are looking to save your vacation time, you should be fine to work the days in between the retrieval and transfer.
Ladybug: good luck on the 2ww, drink lots of water and take it easy as much as you can!
oldmom: good luck with your retrieval!
Thanks to everyone for your support. I have good and bad days. I think epilady said it perfectly , "what is meant for my life if I'm not meant to be a mom?" I just can't imagine the possibility that we might not ever be parents. I feel like there is this gaping hole and I always thought we would have kids by this point in my life. But what if it is not meant to be?
Spoke with my RE about the failed IVF, he said that the quantity and quality of my eggs was worse this time and that my elevated FSH (9.7) indicates that my ovaries are acting older than my age (33). Very discouraging news to hear. We have an appt at the end of the month to see a doctor at Cornell. I guess it will be good to hear his opinion on our chances of success if we try again. I don't want to go thru this again if we have a very low chance of success, but I am not ready to give up. Thanks for listening, it is so helpful for me to share with people who understand the hearbreak I am feeling.
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5/1/2010 7:19 AM
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Sorry, I should have been more clear. My ER was at 3:15 in the afternoon and because of the sedation you cannot drive for 24 hours. That is why I could not drive to work in the AM. There was no other reason from my doctor.
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5/1/2010 1:47 AM
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Lucky....good luck with your upcoming first IVF. Hope it all goes well for you. I've had egg retrieval a few times and, personally, didn't think it was too painful. The day of, I felt a bit crampy/sore but not to the point where it impaired me. The day of retrieval I mostly sleep though due to having been sedated. It leaves you feeling quite tired. By the next day, I have always been fine. If anything, a slight "twinge" now and then. Nothing too bad though and Tylenol can take care of that. My RE has never said anything about driving except for the day of retrieval due to sedation. The next day I went about my normal routine. I do think it is really, really important though to take it easy after transfer. I would use your time off there so that you can keep your feet up and take it easy for implantation. Hope this helps. Again, best wishes for a great IVF and hopefully a baby in your near future.
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4/30/2010 8:29 PM
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Hi ladies!
Wow, this board is active. I'm currently cycling with a donor. We tried one IVF cycle of our own and produced 2 eggs on the highest dosage of stims. I turned 43 last November and had a tubal ligation after my third child from a previous marriage. My currently DH doesn't have any children of his own. We were going to try one more time with our own eggs, but my insurance does not cover the drugs or anything that is not "diagnostic", which we had already gone through and used up. I've been on Lupron since March 31st and Estrace since April 15th. My donor has been on bcps and Lupron and just started Gonal-F yesterday, so ER should be around May 10th or 11th. We'll be doing a 5 day transfer. I try not to let myself get too excited or thinking about what my life would be like having another baby after 10 years. I haven't told family or friends about using a donor and it's been extremely hard keeping it in. I've caught myself about 3 or 4 times from just blurting something out!
TJ......oldmom
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4/30/2010 5:33 PM
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Lucky - I just went through my first IVF cycle in April and my retrieval was on a late Sunday afternoon and my transfer was on a Wednesday. I was not allowed to drive to work on Monday so I worked from home. Went into the office on Tuesday and then took the rest of the week off. Based on what I experienced between the emotions, the pain, the tiredness, etc - I wished I had taken the whole week off to regroup and rest.
Hope this helps... I felt pain for probably 2 days and then just cramping after that...
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4/30/2010 5:07 PM
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Luci - I am so sorry. Please do try and take some comfort in the fact that you had 12 frozen embryos. That is a very high number from what I can tell from other peoples post. My RE is actually only trying to get 10 to 12 embryos total. She said that when you produce higher numbers like 20 the egg quality is not always as high of a grade. So if you have 12 embryos that actually made it then that is very lucky!
btobe - good luck with your retrieval I hope you get some great eggs!
Ladybug good luck on your 2ww. Try and take it easy.
irishgirl - I am so sorry about your BFN. I have also been trying for 3 years with 2 IUI's and will be going through my 1st full cycle of IVF in June. I know how hard it is to try and stay positive. But my RE said that most couples get pregnant in 1 to 3 cycles of IVF. I have also read that 80% of couples get pregnant doing 1 to 3 cycles of IVF. Have you thought about changing RE's?
In the Chicago area there are clinic that have a shared plan. You get 3 to 6 tries at IVF between $16,000 to $26,000. If you don't get pregnant you get 80 to 100% of your money back. So something to think about.
I have a question, for those of you who have been through egg retrieval. Did you have a lot of pain after wards? I am trying to figure out how many vacation days I should request off during this process. I am taking the retrieval day off but I am wondering if I should take more time. If there is a lot of pain in the days after. I am taking more time so I can be on bed rest for 2 to 3 days following the transfer. So I am just trying to figure out how much time to allow myself. Since this will be my first full cycle (hopefully it doesn't get canceled again). I am wondering what to expect.
I know I am such a planner and this whole process has been so frustrating because I thought had my life all planned out. I told my husband that we could start a family right after we got married. HA that was 3 years ago now. Maybe I jinxed myself. I guess I can't really plan my life out, God has other things in store for me.
But I think that for women like us we will appreciate our children so much more because we went through so much to get them. They won't be able to say that they were not wanted!
Hope everyone has a great weekend!
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4/30/2010 5:01 PM
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Luci...I am so very sorry for your loss. It is so hard each & every time. I understand what you meant about wanting "this baby". When I lost my twin boys at almost 23 weeks, I was devasted. After carrying them for so long, birthing them, holding them, etc., it was very hard to see any light at the end of the tunnel. I am grateful though that I have 4 frozen embryos and I know, when the time is right, we will both be glad to try again. Take your time for now to grieve. It's an important part of the entire process and you can't move forward until you go through this. I'll be thinking about you and praying for you.
epilady....good to hear from you again. Sorry that you are struggling also and sorry to hear that your DH is not in a good place. IVF is so hard anyway and it really can take a toll on people and marriages. I hope things work out for you on every level. Take good care.
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4/30/2010 4:25 PM
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Luci: I know that I don't have the right words to make you feel better, but I hope that you find a little comfort in knowing that I am praying for you and your husband to find support and strength in God and each other. I am so sorry that you have to go through this.
FenSox: This is my very 1st IVF cycle, and everything has gone good so far, but the retrieval definitely has me nervous.
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4/30/2010 12:51 PM
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btobe - is this your first retrieval?
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4/30/2010 12:50 PM
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luci1313 - I don't know that I have any advice or answers that will help you and at this point can't even imagine what you are going through - BUT I do think you have to find some part of you that remains positive and strong through this. I think it is great that you have 13 embryos frozen, while it is not being pregnant right now it sure helps make the process easier the next time you try. I produced 11 eggs, only 3 fertilized and only 2 ended up making it. If my beta drops and I miscarry I have to start ALL over and that scares the heck out of me. You are a strong person, you have dealt with a lot - you can deal with this and come out an even better person.
You have to find some peace with the grief, if you don't you may never have success. I believe success is your whole well being including mind. I have faith in you even though I don't know you...
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4/30/2010 12:11 PM
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Hi ladies. I just got back from my RE a little while ago and he scheduled my retrieval for Monday. I am really excited, but also fearful of the unknown. Does anyone have any advice or tips to share?
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4/30/2010 12:11 PM
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I just heard back from the doctor. My beta dropped from138 to97. I stopped my meds . Now I get to sit and wait for the miscarriage to happen. I got back in a week to make sure that everything is dropping , so they know if it is ectopic. I just really thought that this was it. I just don't know how much more loss and disappointment I can take. I know that we can try again and that we have 12 embryos , my husband thinks that telling me this is helpful. it really isn't. I wanted this baby.
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4/30/2010 2:16 AM
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Hi, ladies. Hope you're all doing well.
Toni: "Irishgirl- please do not give up hope, without it we are nothing."
My experience is that we are something without hope: bitter and alone. I know - I've been there too, and am still experiencing bouts of it. What is meant for my life if I'm not to be a mom? One thing I know is that life always keeps pressing forward, and whether the dream is realized or not, there will be other joys and happiness in my life. It may be a grieving process for me multiple times throughout my life, but I do know - and hope you do too - is that there is still beauty and joy whether we are moms or not. It's okay to be angry and to grieve. I wish your heart and soul healing and love.
Luci - I'm sorry to hear of your beta decline. I hope that it surges, too. Let us know.
Ladybug (that's my hubby's nickname for me!) - good luck. Sticky baby dust and hang in there for the 2ww. Grow ladybug jr!!
Not much new on the front with me. Hubby and I are having some severe conflict over old, reemerging patterns. I'm tired of them. One of my friends said, "When the two of you are on, there is no one else like you." That's true. When he's on, he's fabulous. But when he's off - wow. Almost like a totally different person. And he never notices that he's off - it's always me who has to start the prodding. Man, that gets old. I'm trying to cut out coffee. I love coffee. So I've switched to green tea in the mornings. But because of the conflicting research, I decided to try to stop drinking it for the next cycle in June.
Sending hugs out to you ladies in pain, confusion, and waiting. And to those of you who are happy, too.
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4/29/2010 9:23 PM
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Congrats Ladybug......I wish you good luck and baby dust. I will be testing just a few days before you so hopefully we will both be getting BFP's this month
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4/29/2010 8:05 PM
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Irishgirl- please do not give up hope, without it we are nothing. You must continue to dream and even if it takes us longer we will be blessed. I am sure of it God is good and he never lets us down. I have been working on this for 11 years and I refuse to lose hope.
Toni
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4/29/2010 8:03 PM
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Okay Ladybug..... Lots of prays are going to out little baby. Relax and you are pregnant until proven otherwise.
I am glad that the babies thawed well. I am also scared about my babies when it is time to unthaw!!!!
I hope I will be back in the game by september. I guess I could take this time to focus on being healthier and lose some weight.
Luci I am so sorry that the Beta is not working as it should but I am the eternal optimist and I will pray for a surge and better news.
Love Toni
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4/29/2010 7:42 PM
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Toni, sorry to hear about your job. That's tough, but try to keep positive and push forward.
Irishgirl - Sorry IVF didn't work this time around. But please don't lose hope. Your dreams will come true. We are here for you. Stay positive.
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