Yesterday @ 4:18 PM
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Snowie...thanks so much for sharing the article on "marriage". It touched my heart also and I have already passed it along to my hubby and a few other couples. In a sense, it does apply to ttc because sometimes we get so wrapped up in trying to conceive that we forget about the intimacy with our partners and how important that is for us to remain close & in sync with one another. Again, thanks for posting it.
Praying2Be....I am very sorry about your BFN. 38 is not old in most every way and it's frustrating when our eggs don't "still feel young" too. I went the donor egg (DE) route after a few tries with my own eggs and had a very good experience with it. We chose an anonymous donor through our RE clinic. I acutally conceived twin boys on my first try and was so happy. I lost them in January due to preterm labor at over 22 weeks. (Had nothing to do with DE though, my own clotting issue.) Anyway, if you decide to go that direction and have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask. For me, it became more important to become a mommy than it did to have a child from my own eggs. Good luck to you either way.
Nurho....good luck with the new protocol. Hope this cycle is a good one for you!
FaithinChrist....best wishes for a great egg retrieval tomorrow. Hope you gets lots of beautiful eggs that turn into beautiful embies!
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Yesterday @ 8:52 AM
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Not TTC related however this touched my heart and I wanted to share with my girls......
MARRIAGE
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
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2 days ago @ 3:10 PM
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Hi all!
I have been reading all of you posts. Monday I got a BFN on my IVF#2. I had 13 follicles retrieved, of those 9 were injected with sperm for fertilization. Only 4 fertilized. Transfered all four because they were growing slow. Did not get anything!! So depressing. I respond well to stimulation, but I guess my eggs just are not very good. I guess 38 is not that young. Will meet with RE next week to discuss what happened and what to do next. I was thinking that maybe I should go with donor eggs. Does anyone have any insight on donor eggs and what questions I should ask my RE? Thanks for your help!
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2 days ago @ 12:26 PM
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Hi Ladies -- it's been a while since I posted, but I have been reading and keeping up. Quick update on us since we had our BFN in June. After conferring with our RE we decided to start our 2nd cycle using a slightly different protocol than the first. My response has been way better and now I have my ER scheduled for August 2nd. I am also doing acupuncture this time around and not sure if this has had an effect on my response, but it is really relaxing. On the advice of the acupuncturist, I will also have a session pre-transfer, and one post transfer;
Keeping our faith strong that we will be blessed this time around, as financially this is it for us.
Good luck and be strong to everyone else in cycle or in the 2ww.
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2 days ago @ 12:24 PM
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My Estrogen today was 1100. My retreivel is scheuled for Sunday at 8am. I have 9 follicles 7 of them being within 18-22. My uterine lining is 12.5. =) Getting pretty nervous now (ugg)
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7/29/2010 2:33 PM
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luci....dear, so very, very sorry for your BFN. I know you've endured a long road as well. No matter what we endure, the devastation is still there each time. Likewise, you WILL have the joy also someday when you get your BFP. I'm just sorry it didn't happen this time. Refresh my memory if you don't mind...I think you also had MTHFR or something if I remember correctly. What protocol did they have you on for that? I know how we all start dissecting things once we get bad news and start planning for the next time. Do you still have some frozen embies? I'll be thinking of you. Hang in there...it will happen...keep believing. Hugs to you!
Cristeen....so nice to hear from you! Glad you are feeling better and are starting to consider your FET. Your 3 embies are waiting for you and your miracle baby hopefully too! I totally get what you mean about working in L&D. My sister has been in that area for 25+ years...first head nurse of Post partum and then L&D. It always broke my heart about how many women come in there with multiple children, multiple daddies, multiple arrests, etc. and they're usually still quite young and have no future to offer their babies. Maddening, isn't it! It's especially frustrating when we girls would give anything to have our babies. Glad that you and your hubby are talking about moving forward. Good luck and let us know how your meeting goes on the 19th.
My AF showed up yesterday so we are good to go! Waiting for the call from my IVF nurse with the rest of this cycle's plan.
Take care everyone!
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7/29/2010 6:26 AM
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Hi everyone!!
Luci...please know I'm thinking of you. It is so devastating to get that BFN after working so hard to get to that
transfer and to got through the torture of the 2ww. Take some time to grieve and be good to yourself.
Faith...I am rooting for you. Having had 2 cancelled cycles after 5 days on high doses of stims, I often wonder if they cancelled me too soon. The meds are so expensive as you know but I wonder if I would've eventually responded. It looks like you're gonna make it to ER!!!
Snowie...so glad to see you back! Thinking of you and glad you are working on another cycle and not losing faith!
Wannabe...my inspiration!!! You are in my thoughts and prayers everyday for that FET...I really hope this is your time!
I am feeling much better these days after the BFN in June. Wasn't sure I would ever feel better but it has taken alot of talking about how I'm feeling with my DH and alot of support between he and I. We talk alot about how it affected us ..I'm very fortunate to have such a good relationship. I really was afraid I would have to change jobs from labor and delivery. It's not the babies that are difficult....they are the best part!! It's the patients who don't get any prenatal care or drink and take drugs pregnant or have baby after baby and have them taken away because they can't care for them. I have always tried to remain objective in my nursing care but wasn't ready for how this IVF would change me. It's been difficult but has gotten better over time. We have an appt Aug 19th with a new RE. We are finally talking FET. My DH didn't want to try again but is feeling more positive about it this past few weeks as am I. I really feel like we worked so hard to get those embies...we have try with those last three. Not sure how soon we'll go forward, depends what the RE has to say.
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7/28/2010 9:13 PM
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Mablackie - I want to wish you a big congratulations as well! Wonderful news and you are an inspiration to us all in the process. Best wishes to you and your newly extended family. You are blessed.
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7/28/2010 2:33 PM
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Luci- I am sorry for your BFN
Faithnchrist- Thanks for the links I will check them out.
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7/28/2010 2:04 PM
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Hi Ladies -
Fensox - Congrats on almost getting to find out the sex! That must feel wonderful to be half way to the finish line!
Irishgirl - I hope that you are feeling better soon and able to start treatment!
Possiblemom - hoping that you are able to try again soon. I know how hard it is I wish that insurance would cover this!
Wannabe - Good luck with your FET sounds like you are getting closer. Stay positive and try and relax, you will get there. You deserve it after every thing you have been through.
Faithnchrist - Great rise on the numbers! Hope they get some great eggs! I had 9 follicles as well and when they retrieved them I only had 6, but all 6 were really good eggs and they all made it through fertilization. But don't get discouraged if that happens because its all about quality. Good luck to you!
Luci - So sorry for your BFN, but maybe it is too early to know for sure. I would ask your RE why they freeze them at whatever cell stage they are currently at when they are ready to transfer. I thought most clinics freeze them once they are blastocysts. Blast have the most chance of implantation. And it can be hard for the embryos to survive the thawing process. It seems like you would have a higher chance of implantation with blasts with a FET since the success rate is cut in half. I am just asking because I want you to be aware that most clinics from what I have heard don't do this. And if it affects your chances then it's something you should look into. I really hope that everything works out for you and you do deserve to be a mom!!!!
Not much going on here other than I have started to feel nauseous the last few days. I have to eat a lot through out the day in order for it to go away. But I am not complaining I just want this baby to keep growing.
Good luck to everyone!!!
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7/28/2010 1:29 PM
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I just got off the phone with the doctor's. My beta is 0. They want me to come back in on Friday on the off chance that something registers then since it will be day 12, but it is unlikely. I just really thought that it had worked. Everything seemed to fall into place and the embryos were strong and growing. I just don't get it. I sometimes feel like the universe is telling me that I don't deserve to be a mom.
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7/28/2010 12:51 PM
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Snowie1978: Perhaps the attached to websites will help you.
One of them
http://www.sart.org/find_frm.html
provides data on the success of IVF on an indivdual MD/clinic.
The other
http://www.inciid.org/article.php?cat=statemandates&id=243
provides a list of employers that cover infertility under their insurance programs.
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7/28/2010 12:36 PM
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Thanks ladies. I always check in just dont post much as I dont really have much going on. Trying to work out financing for another shot at IVF. Looking at a goal date of Jan 2011 as a cycle date. We are moving in Nov so I am going to give the Clinic there a shot. And if I dont like them there is more than one clinic so I am excited.
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7/28/2010 12:08 PM
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Estrogen:
7/15 13
7/22 29 (4th day on stims, stims increased to 225/225U)
7/24 108
7/26 314
7/28 620
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7/28/2010 11:59 AM
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luci.....thinking about you today and just said a prayer for you. Really, really hoping you get your BFP and a good, strong beta number. Please update when you can...we'll be on pins & needles with you!
Snowie....always good to hear from you and know that you are around. Know you're working towards another IVF round when finances permit. Hope you're making progress that way.
Possible mom....good luck on the finance thing also. It's a big burden for we "IVFer's" that few outsiders understand.
I had my baseline yesterday but still no AF. They think she should show anyday per my lining & estrogen numbers. Will start Estrace shortly there after in preparation for our FET with our 2 embryos. Should be mid-late August. Praying this time works out for us too. Financially, this may be the last shot. FYI though....I have been looking into another clinic, not in my area, but they have a strong "Shared Risk" program where you can cycle up to 6 times (fresh or frozen) and if you don't take home a baby, it is all refundable. I have relatives not too far from this clinic so I could always stay with them and communte. We'll see though..for right now, just praying our FET works!
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7/28/2010 11:48 AM
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Update: My estrogen climbed from 314 to 620. They found 2 new follicles giving me a total of 9 size ranging from 8-20. Looks like the size of my follicles and Estrogen continue to double. I am currently waiting for my nurse to call me back on a trigger date. They may wait a few days for the smaller follicles to grow. Prayerfully this trend continues! =)
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7/28/2010 10:18 AM
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Snowie1978: How are things going with you. It is really good to see you back on the forum.
To all the ladies who have just had your blessings congrats to you and to the one's in the process good luck and may the lord bless you as well.
As for me I am still trying to come up with the resources to try again. I don't want to say I am through but coming up with the money is reall hard.
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7/28/2010 9:08 AM
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Good luck today Luci. Hope you get your BFP and keeper.
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7/27/2010 9:53 PM
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mablackie- congrats!! You give us all hope that this can really happen.
I am trying to be calm and positive right now. Things looked really good the day of my FET. I had blood work on Friday and my estrogen was 420. The nurse was positive about that because last time it only 220 at the same point. I had convinced myself that this is it because everything seemed to be falling into place. Monday my estrogen was 414. My nurse didn't seem to concerned, she said that it can fluctuate. It is still higher than the same point last time. My progesterone has been greater then 40.8. I am just nervous. Tomorrow is my beta. I am so nervous. I am not sure what a good beta would be, it is being done on day 9 since the transfer. Last time I got a positive and I was so happy but my beta was only 38.6 and it never really did what it should and I lost it. I just hope that this is it. We have been trying for a baby for 5 years , 3 of those with our RE. I just don't know how many more losses I can take. I will know tomorrow afternoon. I will let you all know.
Good luck to everyone and good night.
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7/27/2010 12:54 PM
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Macblackie- awesome- so happy to here of your arrivals!!! enjoy being a mom!
Hope: thankyou, as of right now I am only going to do it for maybe 2-3 months, my cramps returned this month and were awful, so the ides of no period kind of sounds nice to me at this point. My endometriosis is not really that severe but my RE feels that this treatment will help. I am just glad to finally know someone else who has tried it, now if you get pregnant I will feel even better!!!!
Every one else hang in there!!!!
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7/26/2010 4:44 PM
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Congratulations on your little boy and little girl, mablackie! You got the jackpot! Glad to hear you made it to 36 weeks and everyone is home healthy. Enjoy every single, precious moment!
Fensox...try not to worry about the "17" number...remember it is just a number and no more significant than any other number for you! Can't wait to hear about your August u/s when you find out the sex. It's a big milestone and then you can start decorating your nursery (if you haven't already!).
I have my baseline tomorrow. Am a bit concerned that my FET may get pushed back as I have not gotten the normal AF that goes with being on Lupron. Hoping it's not another cyst or something else problamatic. Can't anything be simple!?
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7/26/2010 1:38 PM
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Update: My estrogen today day 8 was 314 from 108. My follicles went from 11-13 to 14-17. I have a total of 7 follicles. The RE said that my estrogen level is good in comparison to the # of follicles and their size.
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7/26/2010 12:01 PM
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mablackie - Congrats, this is great news and hope for all of us out here.
I have been reading the posts but have not posted lately. I am in week 17 of being pregnant and remember reading on here how someone had lost their baby in week 17 - so part of me is just wanting to get past this week because that has been in my head from the beginning. I am excited and waiting for August 9th when I hopefully (if baby cooperates) find out the sex of the baby.
Wish every love and luck as they go through this very emotional and stressful process called IVF...
Fensox
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7/26/2010 8:31 AM
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Nwells I was 27 when I did the Lupron treatment. I had every symptom they described. The hot flashes were the worse! A couple months into them I had a big issue with dryness. I would get so dry I was constantly at the doctor for infections. I found that wet wipes were a blessing. I had endo surgery, tried for a couple months to get pregnant and when my pain came back I started the Lupron. I've since had a 3rd endo surgery. Good luck and hang in there!
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7/25/2010 4:35 PM
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mablackie: Congrats on the twins!!
Hope/ Hopeand Faith-- welcome to the forum . This process is long and exhausting but I think you will find this group is great for support.good luck on your journey.
Luci, Nevergive up: good luck in the 2ww, hoping for positive betas!
I have been feeling pretty down recently, still waiting to get off steroid inhalers before I can move forward with
IVF #3. My coughing does not seem to be improving, so there is a chance that this is a chronic condition. Anybody out there have asthma? Seems the research shows it is better to take the inhalers when you are pregnant than to have the fetus not get enough air, but I am not so excited about taking steroids while attempting to get pregnant. Why does this have to be so hard? I was so ready to try again and now I just don't know if and when that will be ....
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7/25/2010 8:45 AM
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faithnchrist - that's great! Hope your cycle goes well!
mablackie - Congrats! That is wonderful I am so glad that you got your babies and they are healthy! You give me hope that this can work and my pregnancy can stick. There are so many stories about miscarriage even if you do get pregnant with IVF it can be hard to be excited to be pregnant. So thank you so much for sharing and giving me hope!
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7/24/2010 7:33 PM
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My IVF twins are here! Caeden James and Kiley Mary Ellen were born on July 18th at 36.4 weeks due to sudden pre-eclampsia. They are both healthy and came home with me after 5 days in the hospital due to a c-section. Caeden weighed 6 lbs 3 ounces and little Kiley weighed 4 lbs 8 ounces. Everyone is doing well!
Girls, it can happen! My miracles babies are proof. Hang in there and don't give up hope. Having to give myself so many shots that it looked like we lived in a crack house...All of the tears when all of my friends called to tell me they were pregnant...again, the lack of a life due to shots, doctor's appointments, etc.. They were all worth it!
Don't give up hope!!!
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7/24/2010 4:22 PM
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My numbers doubled. My Estrogen today (Day 6) went from 29 to 108 and my follicles went from 6-8 to 11-13. The clinic thinks that I am just a slow responder to Stim meds. They also think that I was over suppressed with an intitial estrogen level of 13 from the Lupron. I have another appointment on Monday at 9am. Prayfully my numbers will continue to double. =) Thank you ladies for your response!
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7/24/2010 11:13 AM
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@ Faithnchrist - Don't get bummed yet! My first cycle started out similar to yours (I am 32 with 1 ovary and do not respond well to meds - which we learned during my 1st cycle). They upped my meds and it worked out. Mind you we only had 6 folicles, 5 fertilized and they transferred 2 (none to freeze) but we got pregnant with twins. We later lost them at 11 weeks, but it worked.
Ask yourself 'Do I trust my doc?" If yes, then hold steady and let them do what they do. They know what they are doing and they know the likely outcomes. Make sure you trust your doc - if not, see what they say and consider changing docs at the end of this cycle. In this treatment, there is no room for not trusting your doc. Like I said, I trust my doc - he made a good call last year and we just started stims today - I trust him enough to spend spend a ton of money. They do not mind questions - just ask.
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7/24/2010 8:28 AM
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Hi ladies -
Hope&Faith - Welcome to the forum this is a great place for support and info. We have been trying for 3 years too so I know it's tough but don't give up. My RE said that it can take 1 to 3 cycles to get pregnant. So depending on age and other issues that makes sense. Hang in there.
Nwells - Thanks I am really hoping that I did get lucky and this baby sticks! Good luck with the lupron treatment. Hope you enjoy your weekend!
Luci - That makes sense now, I bet everyone does things differently. Good luck with your Beta! Hoping for high numbers!
Nevergiveup - I have heard that the acupuncture works. I didn't look into it until we were mostly through the cycle. But I thought if I didn't get pregnant I might consider trying it out. Good Luck to you!
faithnchrist rn- Is this your 1st cycle? Also depending upon your age that may have something to do with it. From what I have read on here sometimes if you are older its hard to get follicles to grow. But I would ask your RE why he is keeping you on this cycle as opposed to canceling it. The reason why I ask is because I had my 1st cycle canceled and it was a good decision. I was glad that my RE stopped instead of trying to push me and taking our money. We started on a Sat with 26 estrogen level and by Wed it was only at 48. So since it didn't double they canceled me. They said that it is harder to get your numbers to rise if they don't start to increase early on. So rather than push me through and spend more money to maybe not get any thing they stopped it. I was so devastated when it happened. But looking back it was the best decision. The next time around they completely changed the drug regimen and I responded to the drugs. Some times its better to stop and start over. Saved us thousands of $$$. My next cycle while I did respond I had about 9 follicles and at retrieval I only had 6 eggs. This also scared me but all 6 eggs were good quality and they all fertilized. So its all about quality then quantity. Some times they just need to learn more about your body, because everyone is different. I know I kind of rambled on but I hope this info helps you. Good Luck to you!
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7/23/2010 11:46 PM
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I am soooo bummed. I started stim meds on Monday went for my US and BW on Thursday I have 7 follices ranging from 6-9 in size my estrogen was only 29. My baseline estrogen was 13. They increased my Menopur to 225 IU and my follistim stayed at 150 IU. I have an appointment tomorrow morning at 9am for an US and BW. I am really praying for a miracle. After waiting this long I really thought it would be easier than this with IVF. ='(
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7/23/2010 4:02 PM
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BC and anyone interested in acupuncture....I would highly recommend doing acupuncture through an IVF treatment. The research has clearly shown it almost doubles your success. I have just completed my 2nd attempt at IVF and we are waiting for the results. I did acupuncture both times. I absolutely loved it and there was no pain involved. Don't think of it as extra needles because it's nothing like injections. It puts your body in a very relaxed state, something every woman could use during the long process of fertility treatments. Important note: do your research on finding an acupuncturist!!! I'm not sure how or why your person told you your eggs would double....acupuncture will not aid in that. Only medications, god, and fate have to do with the number of eggs they can get from each attempt. I checked with 2 acupuncturists before responding to you if that helps. I really believe in the research done and know it helps, but how somewhat remains a mystery. Don't let that deter you. Ask your doctors, friends, online, and find a great acupuncturist that works for you. I saw mine (both times, different people) 3 months prior to the IVF and on the day of implantation/transfer, he came to my house immediately before and was there right after the transfer. 2 treatments were done that day and the sooner you can get them done that big day, the better. Unfortunately, the hospital I go to does not allow acupuncturists onto the floor so he willingly came to my house as I needed to be on that lovely bed rest Hope this helps and please shoot me any questions if you have more!
Good Luck!
Katie
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7/23/2010 8:31 AM
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Lucky- Thanks. My clinic is a little different. When we thought we would get to do a fresh cycle, they had a 3 day transfer date before I even had my ER. I am not quite sure why but that is how my doctor always does it. The lab freezes them on whatever day the transfer was scheduled for. I just hope that it works. Congrats on the baby. That is wonderful news!
I am getting ready for my first blood work. Beta on Wed.
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7/23/2010 8:28 AM
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hello all
Faith and Hope: welcome yes this place is great and the ladies are amazing!!! I haven't posted in a while because I am in a limbo period, however I will be starting the Lupron treatment next month. MY RE is giving me my first Lupron shot in like two weeks, then I will get another shot in Sept and then she will evaluate me to see if I need another or if i should go straight into an IVF. Mind you I have been going through this for 2 years, trying to conceive for 3. We did 4 IUI's and have already done 3 IVF's- last Nov I had the endo surgery, our 3rd IVF was after and after that didn't work, my RE decided to do a mock cycle and we had more testing and NOW the dreaded Lupron treatment. Can you give me a little insight into your treatment. I am very nervous about it, my RE says I will be in Menopause so I will have hot flashes and night sweats and moodiness- great just what I need!!!! Thanks.
Lucky looks like you have gotten lucky!!! so exciting!!! I am waiting patiently for that day!!!
Luci- I hope this is it for you!!!
Wanna- hang in there and good luck with your cycle- I will soon be there too. Myrtle is making her appearance, she is moving in slow, but she is letting me know she is here, what a witch!!!! HEy I guess one advantage of this whole Lupron treatment thing is NO MYRTLE for two possible three month- I won't be miss her I can tell you that!!!!
To all the ladies, I hope everyone is doing well have a great weekend, I am heading to New Hampshire with our four legged son to do some hiking and swimming- he is a lab/sheppard mix and LOVES the water!!!!
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7/23/2010 7:48 AM
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Hi ladies, what a wonderful forum! I have had a hard time finding people to talk to! Not everyone can understand what you are going through, unless you've been through it. My husband and I have just begun our first IVF cycle (hopefully last). We did 3 unsucessful super stim and IUI cycles. A week after finding out our last cycle did not work, my younger sister told us that they were pregnant and only tried for a month. We were devestated, but happy for them at the same time.
I've just started the Lupron Wednesday. I was on Lupron for 6 months to treat my endo. pain, so I'm dreading the next couple weeks.
We are trying to stay positive, but after 3 years of disappoinment it's hard to.
Thanks everyone for your posts, they are truly motivating!
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7/23/2010 7:38 AM
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Hi Ladies -
Luci glad your FET went well. I didn't realize that they froze embryo's that didn't make it to blast stage. We had 2 at 7 cell and 1 at 6 cell. The embryologist told us we had about a 30% chance that one would make it to blast to be frozen. So we didn't freeze any based upon his recommendation. But every clinic is probably different. We transferred back 2 embryos at 8 cell and one 7 cell. I was a bit disappointed that I didn't get to freeze any but I was lucky to have 2 good ones put in and one they rated fair the 7 cell. I really hope everything works out for you!
As for me I guess they aren't as concerned with my betas anymore. I went for my ultrasound yesterday and I had one gestational sac with the yolk. Which is what they wanted to see. So now that they can see it they don't really need to keep testing the betas. My nurse said that this was a huge monument. The next apt is in 2 weeks and we will listen to the heart beat and take measurements. She said after they hear the heart beat I can relax a bit more because the chances of miscarriage go down. I am really hoping my age is on my side and I can keep this baby! This was our last chance and I am so grateful to God for getting me this far.
By the way has anyone here ever had an ultrasound and seen one sac and then had a twin pop up later? The nurse said that anything can happen but that it's likely we are having one baby.
Hope everyone has a nice weekend!
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7/22/2010 8:18 AM
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Well I am off of bed rest. I just get so restless.
My Fet went pretty well. They had to thaw out 5 embies. We had and 8 and 7 cell die. They thawed out 3- 6 celled. They were happy because one grew to 7 cells , one grew to 8 and one grew to a morula, which is the stage before blastocyst. They were all still thriving when they put them in. I am a little more hopeful then last time. I did get a bfn but out of the 3 embies they all survived the thaw but only one of them grew a cell. I go in for blood work tomorrow, Monday and my beta is Wed. I am trying not to be too scared. I just hope that I get a BFP and that my numbers are better than last time and that this is our happy ending.
Good luck to all. I will keep you posted.
WannaBe - thanks for the luck. I hope that you get your miracle soon. You are stronger than me. I don't know if I could have sat there and then not been curled in the fetal position for days. I admire you for that.
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7/21/2010 10:51 AM
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Hi Ladies -
Wannabe - Good luck on the lupron.
Luci - hope the FET went well and you are doing OK and taking it easy.
Hope123 - Welcome to the group. My DH had sperm issues but the RE said she had seen a lot worse and people getting pregnant on there own. I have no known issues and I am 30. I think our problem was the sperm and egg getting together. But if you have sperm issues I would suggest ICSI where they inject the sperm into the egg. All of my eggs fertilized this way. I am currently pregnant from our 1st IVF attempt. Good Luck to you! I would also say that the waiting on every step can be very difficult. But I prayed a lot and that helped!
So I am a little freaked out. I went for another beta test yesterday, and Friday it was at 1299 and by Tuesday it was 2477. It should have doubled more since there were 4 days in between. Has anyone had this happen? I am wondering if as it gets higher it slows down a but? I mean the number is still high but all last week it doubled every time. So the nurse said I shouldn't be worried yet. They are going to do an ultrasound and beta tomorrow. I just really hope there is at least 1 gestational sac in there. The nurse said it's possible that since I had 3 put back that its possible that 1 embryo went away. Not sure what to think.
Anyone have any advice? Thanks!
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7/18/2010 4:57 PM
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Hey luci......just wanted to wish you the very best of luck with your FET tomorrow. I really hope this is your time. I'll say a prayer for you.
Snowie...you've been on my mind. You always have a place here with us. I'm hoping God opens a window for you so you can cycle again and hopefully, get your miracle baby. Bought a lottery ticket lately? Might be time!
Cristeen...have thought of you so often and wish your cycle had been different. Know and completely understand that you are disheartened? it's devastating to turn to DE and then have it fail. I think even more so than with our own eggs because "supposedly" this is the sure fire way to get there. Do you know if your donor's previous cycles had resulted in BFP's or not and if so, were they first time, FET, etc.? May give you some insight/reassurance about cycling again. Don't know if you ever checked out the other blog I mentioned about DE. If not and you're interested, I can give you the link again. It is very educating to learn how long it's taken/not taken for others, etc. I'm thinking of you and hoping your miracle is just on "ice" for the timebeing.
I am doing OK. On Lupron....yet again...6th time...yowza! FET will be in mid-late August as of now. Have my suppression on 7/27. We will transfer our last 2 remaining embryos so praying they implant. It's been a hell of year in so many ways so we could really use some wonderful news. Have not lost heart or faith though. That is all we have, girls, to hold onto...so don't lose it either! We attended a new church today for the first time. Have known the pastor via friends and attending his Bible study before. He performed the service for our baby boys at their memorial and burial. Anyway, so my DH and I are sitting there with our former neighbors and a couple with 10 day old fraternal twin girls walk to the front and proceed to baptize them. I look at my DH (our friend is sitting between us) and we both just start crying. I thought I was going to have to leave the room, the tears came so profusely for us both, but somehow made it through. I told my DH it was meant for us to be there today. I believe it was God's way of telling us our boys are OK in Heaven and to not give up hope that our miracle is still waiting for us. Yours are waiting for you too!
Good luck to everyone in cycle. I don't spread "baby dust" anymore as my experiences have led me beyond that. But, I do spread good wishes, prayers, and hope. To those of you gals waiting....your turn will come too. Through it all.....I still believe!!!
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7/18/2010 2:46 PM
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Snowie- I am so sorry.
I am getting ready to leave to go to the hotel. My Fet is tomorrow at 8 am. The hospital is only about and hour and a half away, but this way we don't have to rush. I am really nervous. I have never met the doctor or the nurses. I just really hope that it works this time and that my numbers are strong and double like they are supposed and that this time it will be a happy ending instead of a tragic one. I hope to not go stir crazy on bedrest.
Wish me luck. I will check back on Thursdaywhen I am off bed rest.
Good luck to all and sticky baby dust.
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7/17/2010 2:22 PM
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Cristeen- Thanks for reaching out to me. I really appreciate it. Sometimes I feel really out of place here because I do have children already. But I love all the ladies here and I wouldnt want to leave them. But yes it is very hard to deal with decisions that we made thinking we were doing the right thing and then 10 years down the road realize it was the biggest mistake of your life. I look at the hurt in my wonderful husbands eyes and I wish there was something I could do. But for now we will focus on the family we do have and hope that we can come up with the money to try IVF again.
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7/17/2010 10:15 AM
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Hi everyone. I am new to IVF and was just reading thru the IVF buddies forum and thought it would be a great way to calm my nerves. My husband and I have our first IVF consult on Wednesday and I am just wondering what to expect. What is a typical timeline? We are doing IVF because of low sperm quality. Is there anyone else with a similiar story? Hope to hear from you soon! So glad I found this site.
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7/17/2010 1:47 AM
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Snowie...been thinking about you as our stories have alot in common. I know having other children ( I have three) still doesn't take away the ache. I remember when you were thinking about having the reversal and I was wishing I could do the same. But with my age, it was better to go right to IVF. As it turned out, a reversal would not have worked as my ovaries didn't respond to stims and I had to go for a donor. And I still ended up with a BFN. It hurts every single day. I don't know what it's like for women who don't have any children but noone knows what it feels like to voluntarily have your tubes tied at 27 yrs old like I did because my marriage was unhealthy and I was overwhelmed raising 3 kids very close in age with very little support from their father. I knew I wanted a divorce and I thought I was doing the right thing. Now I have someone in my life I love so much who is a wonderful stepfather and who deserves his own child and I can't make that happen. And we financed everything we could to do IVF with a donor and it still didn't happen. It's really hard not to ask why and not to feel guilty in some way for making that decision 13 yrs ago. I say thanks to God everyday for what I have but the ache in my heart is always there. I wish there was something I could say...just know I'm thinking of you.
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7/16/2010 8:13 PM
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Hi ladies -
Snowie - So sorry about your tubes. You are very blessed to have 2 children and I hope you can enjoy them and they bring you some comfort.
Nwells - I hope everything goes well with your lupron.
As for me the nurse called and said my labs looked beautiful and to keep it up. I doubled again in 48 hours to 1299! I go back in Tuesday for another beta test, hopefully at this rate I will be well past 2000 and then they can do an ultrasound then on Thursday to look for gestational sacs. I am praying that we can see at least 1 baby! Then maybe it will feel more real, I am still so scared to believe that this is actually going to happen.
Good Luck to everyone. Hope you all have a nice weekend!
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7/16/2010 8:29 AM
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Snowie- so sorry, I teared for you.
Waiting to here when I will begin the lupron process, I will keep everyone posted, figure at this point what do I have to loose right. My RE has been recommending this for the last year, there must be a reason for it, I hope!!!
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7/15/2010 9:47 PM
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Oh I completely understand and so sorry.
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7/15/2010 9:30 PM
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IVF2Mom- I did IVF already and I m/c the fresh cycle and chemical the 2nd. I have two children then had my tubes tied b/c I was in a bad abusive relationship. Now I have the man of my dreams my best friend and soulmate and since IVF didn't work and we couldn't afford another fresh cycle we tried TR and now it has scarred closed apparently. So nothing more we can do.
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7/15/2010 6:26 PM
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Snowie, I don't know all your history but I have 2 blocked tubes as well. To keep the infection out i had one tied and one removed. it's not the end of the world, just means IVF is you only option. I never got a chance to try any other treatments and went straight to IVF. Goodluck
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7/15/2010 5:42 PM
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Oh, Snowie....I am really so very sorry to hear that your tubes are blocked. It just stinks, nothing more to say about that! Did the clinic that did it offer you any kind or recourse if this happened? I hate to hear that this is the end for you. I will be praying that God opens up a window for you somehow, some way. Don't know what else to say but I will be thinking of you and praying for you. Take good care, Snowie. XO
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7/15/2010 5:34 PM
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Had my HSG today instead of tomorrow (they had an opening) anyway both of my tubes are blocked again so this is the end of the road for sure for us. I wish all of you much luck
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